Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.
1Corinthans 6: 18-20
Ella lay on her bed sobbing, begging God to restore her broken heart. Yet again she had laid her heart bare for a boy whom she thought could fulfill all her dreams; a boy whom she had depended on to bring wholeness to her life and always be there for her. At the age of sixteen she thought she had found the man of her dreams. He said he loved her, he said he would wait for her forever if that’s what it took. He made her feel special and valued; he told her she was beautiful. He said he would do anything for her.
What happened? How did such an apparently beautiful relationship turn out so horrible? How did something so special turn into something so entirely sinful? Not only did Ella give away her purity for a guy who cared no more for her than an old tennis shoe, but she was left with the guilt, regret, and hopelessness that she was ruined for life. How could anyone love her? How could she ever love or trust anyone again? How had she lost her focus on God and gotten so caught up in her relationship?
Maybe you have felt this way before, maybe you have seen a friend go through a similar situation, maybe you have no clue what I am talking about. Praise God for that! However, what I want everyone to get out of this chapter, no matter where you are from or what you have done, is to understand how important it is to live every area of our lives in a way that reflects the gospel. This might sound boring or impractical to you but just give me a chance to explain what I mean.
Let’s start by talking about what the gospel really means and why it is important to have a true understanding of how it can affect our lives. The gospel is a very simple but life-changing message. Ephesians 1: 4-8 is a perfect outlining of the gospel throughout history and how we are to respond to it in our lives.
“For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as His sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will- to the praise of His glorious grace, which He has freely given to us in the One[His Son] He loves. In Him we have redemption of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that He lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.”
Just to break this down, what Paul is saying here is that your life was not an accident, what happens to you is not luck. From the very beginning of the world, God knew exactly who you were and what he had planned for you. You were not a surprise to God you are a miracle of His grace! God knew that you were going to mess up, yet He still chose you. He picked you in spite of your rebellious nature towards Him, through the cloud and stench of your sin God pulled you out and drew you towards Himself and a life over flowing with grace, unconditional love, and purity. Not only did God do all these things, but because God is a just God He couldn’t just ignore your sin. There had to be justice. This is the gospel…God substituted your sin, your guilt for the perfect purity and holiness of His Son. In other words, when you deserved to be punished, God took your punishment and laid it all on the back of His dear Son. Then He turned on Him all the wrath that you and I deserved. All the fury of His righteous anger was directed to the perfect soul and body of Jesus Christ. Praise God! We owe Him our everything! We can now call ourselves Daughters of God who have the undeserved privilege of sharing in the inheritance of Christ in Heaven forever one day!
So how does this influence purity in our lives? It is the essence of purity in our lives! Many books have been written on the subject of purity. Several of which have greatly influenced my life including “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”, by Joshua Harris; “Passion and Purity” by Elizabeth Elliot; “And the Bride Wore White” by Dannah Gresh; and “When God Writes Your Love Story” by Eric and Leslie Ludy. All these books are excellent and I would recommend them to all of you to read if you are looking for a good book on purity. However, this chapter isn’t so much focused on how to be pure but rather why to be pure. What is the purpose of purity? You might have heard that you should be pure because you have people looking up to you, or so that you can be a virgin when you get married. These are great and godly reasons to pursue purity but in my opinion it is not the main reason to pursue purity. The main reason to live purely is stated in the verse at the beginning of this chapter- “You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.” This verse merges the subject of purity and the beauty of the gospel in two short sentences. Throughout this chapter we will look at this verse and its significance on our lives.
We’ve talked about the gospel and I hope it has been explained in a way that is easy to understand; so in light of that let’s discuss the reason for purity. Purity is defined in the Webster’s Illustrated Dictionary as “the quality of being free of blemishes”. Honestly, purity doesn’t just refer to sexual purity but for this chapter at least that will be our main focus. Sexual purity is a matter of being free of blemishes physically, emotionally, and spiritually. This is so much easier said than done but by the grace of God it is absolutely possible for us to achieve. Of course all of us are blemished and spotted in some way because of sin. But when we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior then we are covered by the purity of His life. This does not mean that we can just live however we want and say, “It doesn’t matter what I do, Jesus will always love me. Once I’ve been saved, I’ll always be saved no matter what I do.” In a sense this is true but the Bible also says, If you love me, you will keep my commandments” and “you will know them (Christians) by their fruit”. Life is a constant fight for purity in every area of our lives. Especially in our society today sex out of marriage is accepted every day, but that does not mean that it is acceptable in God’s economy. We are to be pure so that we bring glory to God. God is honored by a life of purity and honoring and glorifying God should be the main goal of our lives. When we can come to the understanding that life is not about us, it is not about our feelings, it is not even about our personal happiness, it is about giving God the glory in every area of our lives including purity. Perhaps you just read that sentence and are a little offended that you are not the center of the universe; well all I can say is wake up and smell the coffee! Never in the Word of God are the thoughts and feelings of man above God’s. Throughout scripture God is the center. He is the Holy of Holies, the Lord of Lord, and the King of Kings. This is how the gospel and sexual purity connect. When we can trust God with the area of our lives regarding sexual purity that is when God can be most glorified and that is when we will receive the most blessing in our lives. Girls, God is the greatest romantic. Yes, because He is the creator of the universe He does require all our attention, honor, and love; but God loves us too. He loves us unconditionally. His plans for us are far beyond what we can think or imagine. But we have to give Him our lives. God cannot work in a life that is against Him. I would venture to say that even as Christians there can be areas of our lives that we haven’t given to God, especially the area of sexual purity.
Many of the Old Testament prophets bring up the romantic love of God’s to His people in a beautiful way. So let’s take a quick look at the love of God for His people.
1. Zephaniah 3: 17, “The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.”
2. Psalm 86: 13, “For Thy lovingkindness to me is great, and Thou hast delivered my soul from Hell…But, Thou O Lord, art a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abundant in lovingkindness and truth.
3. Song of Solomon 2: 16, “My Beloved is mine and I am His.”
4. Jeremiah 29: 11, “For I know the plans that I have for you says the Lord, plans of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
Each of these verses describes a different way that God loves His people. He loves us by protecting us, by taking great delight in us and comforting us in His love. He loves us by forgiving us and being slow to anger when we mess up. He loves us by cherishing us above any other. He also loves us by providing for us and planning our future so that we will never have a lack of anything. Looking at all these things; isn’t that the way we want to be loved by men? Don’t we seek protection, compliments, love, security, and provision in our relationships? God has said right here in His Word that He wants to give us all these things, so trust Him. Give your heart to Him and let Him work out the details.
In light of that, how do we flee from sexual immorality and run into the arms of Christ? Let’s break it down. The word flee here is an active verb. We can’t just live our lives hoping that God will not allow sexual temptation to come to us, we have to have our armor on and our shield up, ready for the Devil’s attacks. There is no question in my mind that we will be faced with sexual temptations some time in our lives. Some people may have more of a problem with it than others but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t all be adequately prepared.
As I said before, I want this to be more of a “why” chapter on purity rather than a “how to” chapter on purity but I think there does need to be some of the “how to” in here to help direct us in what to do after we understand why we should live purely. Here are several verses that describe to us how to live a life that is seeking after purity for God’s glory and our sanctification. Some of these things may seem difficult or even impossible, but with the help of the Holy Spirit living in us, all things are possible.
1. “Take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.”- 2 Corinthians 10: 5. Our actions proceed from our thoughts. The reason it is so important that we take every thought captive is because we tend to act the way we think. Like Jesus says when He is talking about how you will know whether or not someone is a Christian, “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” If we think impure thoughts or even just silly thoughts like, “I think he likes me!” Or, “Maybe if I wear this shirt, even though it’s a little low, and this skirt, even though it’s a little short, he will look at me longer and give me some extra attention.” These thoughts are not godly or honoring to the young man you are thinking about. It is very important that we examine the way we think and bring it under the subjection of Christ’s law.
2. “Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discretely” – 1 Timothy 2: 9. Be modest ladies! Yes wearing revealing clothing will get you more attention, but not the kind of attention that you want. One day walking down the sidewalk at school, I overheard a young man talking about a young woman who was walking by, because of the clothes she was wearing he said, right in the middle of a conversation, “Whoa, I just totally got distracted”, as he stared right at the girls exposed body. Is that the way you want guys to think and talk about you? I am not going to tell you what is appropriate to wear; I will leave that up to the discretion of you and your parents. However, think about this when you get dressed in the morning… when you look in the mirror when you are dressed, what do you think about your outfit? If thoughts like these come to your mind that is a sign that you are not dressing modestly, “Wow! These shorts make my legs look hot!” “I hope So-and-so notices that my shirt is a little more revealing than normal. Maybe he’ll talk to me now.” Dressing to get attention is totally unbiblical. Our culture tells us that we get what we want be selling our bodies, however the Bible tells us that we will be more happy if we let it be the inner beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit that shines through to accentuate our external beauty.
3. “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything with prayer and supplication let your requests be made known to God.”- Philippians 4: 6. Bring everything to God in prayer. I cannot express the importance of prayer too much. God loves you and cares for all your needs. If you are not sure about a relationship or feel like you are not following God’s path for you, take your concerns to Him. He promises that if you seek Him with all your heart He will answer you. One of the most important areas of purity is constantly making sure that Christ is the center of your life. If He is the number one priority in your life then everything else will fall into place. If you are working on and pursuing a deep relationship with Christ then He will speak into your life. He will direct your path and show you what His will is for you. Just think, God already has Mr. Right picked out for you. So why should you be worried about finding “the right one”? God truly is in control of all situations even the ones that you feel like are impossible. There are men in this world who daily seek to honor God and if God wills that you marry one day, then he will give you the man who is your perfect match. To me that is so exciting and relieving!
We must seek God with all our hearts so that He can be glorified! We are not our own, we must live in a manner that reflects the image of the one who saved us. When we do that there is no telling the way that God will be able to use us. We know He loves us unconditionally and that He already has every area of our lives planned out, including our love life. Trust Him with everything you have!
“The world has yet to see what God can do through one person wholly committed to Him”. D. L. Moody
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